My Old Friends

I enjoy talking to elderly people. They are wise and experienced, and despite any physical disabilities, most of them are kind and willing to share their wisdom with the younger generation. These people greatly value their remaining time and fight to make the most of it. Many of them have regrets, and listening to their stories helps me understand how to live as fulfilling a life as possible. Hearing from me makes them feel young and heard; hearing from them makes me feel loved and protected. They are very happy when I call, and so am I when they answer.

The hardest part is when there is no one left to pick up the phone. Last August, one of my mentors, a renowned neurologist, passed away. He was 100 years old, and his passing took me by surprise and saddened me terribly. He used to say that having a balanced lifestyle is the secret to longevity and that people should treat their bodies like they will live 200 years, not 40 – "If only they did that, their lives would improve dramatically."

This man had the privilege of meeting some of the greatest people in recent history, many of whom became his close friends. Pope John Paul II was just a phone call away, as were many other important figures of the 21st century. Listening to him and being around him taught me many meaningful lessons, the most important one being not to take unnecessary risks, especially when it comes to our health, freedom, safety, and integrity. Families are sacred, and we should ensure that nothing bad happens to them as well. Sitting next to a man who bore witness to the past 100 years of the world is an experience not everyone has the chance to encounter. It gave me a lot of joy, but when it ended, everything collapsed over me.

A few months prior, another friend of mine passed away. He was an 87-year-old historian, and for 70 years, he relentlessly showed up every day at the university, giving lectures to students who eagerly listened to every word he said. Both he and his older friend, the neurologist, taught me that working is the key to a healthy brain. "A healthy brain means a healthy life," they used to say.

Living with the fear of losing these friends is not easy. Every time I hear their voices, it brings me a moment of joy. Many of these people have no family to take care of them. The more renowned ones pay someone to look after them, while others live their lives with the constant fear that if they fall on the stairs or get sick, there won't be anyone to rush them to the hospital, cook for them, or wash for them. They are fighting death every minute, and most of the time, they scare it away. Until they don't...

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Last year, I met an 86-year-old mathematician who became a lighthouse for the ship that is my life. He is still active, physically and intellectually, and his stories are amazing! Alongside Mathematics, he studied philosophy and learned how to operate computers with precision. Every time I call him, he tells me, "Mihai, you made me optimistic again!" Hearing this almost makes me cry. These people are a treasure, and we should cherish them while we still have them around.

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This week, I heard again from two friends of mine, who are music teachers and have spent their lives planting the seed of beauty inside children's hearts. The first one, whom I've known since she became my teacher in the 5th grade, is now 75 years old and feels better than ever. Her family lives in another city, she divorced her husband when she was 22, and every time I call her, she tells me how much she enjoys retirement.

Her friend, a 78-year-old teacher, is my conversation partner for 3-hour-long chats. She was a renowned soprano and is currently dealing with health problems that have affected her sight and mobility. Both women are very optimistic, always smiling, and talking about beautiful memories and plans for the future. It's a thrill to talk to them, as they give me energy and motivation to move forward even when things do not go as planned.

Having someone to look up to is very important. Even though it's painful to lose your friends one by one to the lady in black, the experiences gathered in the moments you were together, whether physically or emotionally, are priceless. Part of the reason why I am where I am today is because those elders took the time to explain, to the best of their abilities, what life is, how to live it properly, and how to change the world for the better.

In the loving memory of C.B. Stolnici and R. Theodorescu,
Leeuwarden, the Netherlands